Tuesday, July 5, 2011

A Line in the Sand


I am still hovering at 240 pounds, which, when you were closing in on 300 is a great accomplishment. If you need to be down to 190 by December 18th then the numbers are not so bueno. Here I am almost 2 years into this journey and at the same point I have been twice before. The problem is I can’t diet effectively. I cannot tell myself no. I am fully capable of working out harder, more often and more effectively, but I can’t diet and this project will ultimately fail because of it.

No, I am not throwing in the towel, I am just being honest. I have found that I like to blog more when I am accomplishing my goals, and if you go back and look at all of my blog posts there is a very circuitous route. Start project, workout, drop some weight, write about it, write about it, hit stalling point, and disappear for awhile. My goal this time is to not disappear.

Bernie is pretty stoked right now with my physical effort. I am currently rock climbing 5.9 runs, which is the equivalent of skiing a black diamond (albeit very cautiously). I am fully progressed on the shifter www.theshifter.com and subsequently have not come close to spraining my ankles even though I have been in multiple moments where I normally would have. Where I am at now is the mental struggle against myself and the eating habits I have built up from my college days.

There is a very real chance that nothing ever comes of Dunk. My original goal was to figure out a way to break into Hollywood and use Dunk as my connector to production companies who then would allow me to pitch my screenplays. I don’t really care about acting but I viewed Dunk as a good way to tell of a heartfelt journey about a husband and father who wants to live an active productive life with his family. If my comedic talents come across so be it, if Dunk gets me into Sundance and eventually to the podium at the Oscars then great. But right now I need to diet and this is my last chance to do so.

I am not worried about numbers anymore, I just want to see myself diet for one solid month. Again, if anyone out there has some great diet tips please send them my way at cspannagel@gmail.com